The other day I was really taken aback. Those pesky little animals had answered back. While I was out the back , they had all got together for a little chat.
I actually know the ring leader is a little blue duck called Jack. Because he kept saying it's all water off a ducks back. Well it might be now, but when I look back, I can see that he liked to quack, quack, quack.
He's as sharp as a tack that little Jack and he's apparently been keeping track, studying our sales figures which are now well and truly in the black. So instead of just sitting back, little Jack was on the inside track and acted off his own back. He could see he was very popular and his picture was selling stacks and stacks and stacks. And that little duck liked to quack, quack quack.
So he decided to change tack and banded together all the other animals so they could have their very own little card packs.
He went behind my back did that naughty little Jack and he phoned our printers for a bit of a yack. I must admit that he had the knack for seeing our customers might like to buy our new and cute card packs.
He put a handkerchief over the telephone and spoke in a muffled tone impersonating me, so there wouldn't be any come back. Our printers went ahead and produced stacks and stacks and stacks of our new card packs.
A stab in the back from this little quack?
I was so cross, I blew my stack. I thought, I know... I'll hire a mafia hitman to give him a 'whack'.
Calming down I then thought there'd be some 'come back' and plenty of flack if the poor little duck received a sudden attack .
Instead I wouldn't hold back, I would hand him his P45, show him the door and give him the sack!
But he's a tough nut to crack that sharp little Jack, he'd know his own employee rights and that would be my draw back.
About this time the card packs arrived, right on track. I looked at the animal packs piled high in a stack and thought I've been a bit hard on poor little Jack. He's very entrepreneurial as a matter of fact!
If he entered 'The Apprentice' he'd give it a crack , but Alan Sugar would surely fire him, for answering back.
Instead we've now honoured bold little Jack and written his name on a special plaque, To Jack our very special 'Employee of the Month'
....this bit doesn't rhyme, as by now I've completely lost track.
There are 26 different card packs to choose from. We have shown a sample of them here.
Would you like roast duck for Christmas Lunch? I'm giving one away, but he doesn't know it yet!
He'd make a nice snack, would cute little Jack.
